THE BRIEF
I’m just going to say it.
Most of the branded merchandise you’ve ever bought did absolutely nothing. It went from a box to a table to a drawer. Probably sitting next to a hotel keycard from 2019 and some dead batteries.
Nobody asked whether it was working. Nobody tracked it. The budget was approved, the event happened, and everybody just did it again the next year. Same stuff. Same results. Same questions never asked.
That’s what this newsletter is about. I cover the good, the bad, and the ugly of the branding world every week using my experiences with branded merchandise. Real brands, real decisions, real verdicts. No trade publication stuff. No press releases. No pretending everything is fine when it clearly isn’t.
I’m Brett Coplin. I’ve been in this business since 2002. I’ve seen what happens when brands actually get this right. I’ve also watched a lot of very expensive stuff end up in a landfill. This is where I talk about the difference, and I don’t pull punches doing it.
Welcome to Issue #1. Let’s go...
ON THE AGENDA
Patagonia literally gave away the whole company to fight climate change. Then turned around and sued a climate activist. Can’t make this up.
Adidas made one five-minute film. Nike built a whole content machine. The World Cup hasn’t even started and one of them is already losing.
Liquid Death just finished three years of the smartest brand collab anyone’s done lately. Worth understanding what they actually built.
Target dropped Pokémon…again. Sold out again.
THE LEAD
The Brand That Gave Itself Away Just Sued an Activist.
In 2022, Yvon Chouinard gave Patagonia away. The whole thing. To a nonprofit. Every dollar of profit goes to fighting climate change. It was a genuinely remarkable move. Nobody does that. The brand credit was enormous and completely deserved.
Then January 2026 showed up.
Patagonia filed a federal trademark lawsuit against Wyn Wiley, a drag queen who performs as Pattie Gonia. Wiley has raised around $4 million for environmental nonprofits and hikes 100 miles in full costume to get people excited about the outdoors. Wiley has two million followers and is doing, almost word for word, what Patagonia says it exists to do.
The lawsuit asks for $1 in damages. But Wiley says the legal fees could run seven figures. On June 2nd, Patagonia published settlement terms: kill the trademark applications, stop using our logos, stop selling clothes under the Pattie Gonia name. Wiley’s response that same day was pretty simple. “No deal, Patagonia.”
Patagonia’s actual products aren’t jackets and bags. It’s the idea that they care more than everyone else does. Every repair program, every land donation, every product they’ve ever made has been proof of that idea. So when you threaten a climate activist with seven figures in legal fees, you’re not just making bad PR. You’re contradicting the only thing that makes you Patagonia and not just another jacket company.
Should they protect their trademark? Of course. I’m not arguing that. But the comments on their settlement post were calling it “the most tone-deaf corporate response of 2026.” That’s attached to them now.
You can’t spend your way out of that story.
↗ ABC News, Time, LGBTQ Nation — June 2, 2026
THE RUNDOWN
Adidas Made a Five-Minute Film. Nike Built a Content Calendar. One of Those Is Winning the World Cup Before It Starts.
Adidas dropped “Backyard Legends” on May 7th. Five minutes with Messi, Chalamet, Bellingham, and younger versions of Beckham and Zidane. Fifty-six million Instagram views in four days.
Nike came back with 42 celebrities, Polaroid drops, and a 12-week content rollout. The World Cup opens Thursday. Adidas already owns the conversation. Nike is still teasing.
The thing to remember: One clear story told well beats a system designed to stay busy. It’s not even close.
FIFA Had the Biggest Merch Moment in Years and Blew It Completely.
Levi’s dropped 13-country ringer tees. Puma did a football culture capsule with Salehe Bembury. Kith and Adidas dropped a Messi collab. Official FIFA city merch right now? Unisex hoodies. Block letters. “FIFA 26 Dallas.” A hundred bucks. Six and a half million visitors. Six billion viewers. The biggest physical brand moment of the decade and the official gear looks like it was approved by someone who’s never bought a t-shirt they actually wanted to wear.
The thing to remember: Every fashion brand in the market saw this coming. The one running the event apparently didn’t.
↗ TheStreet / Brand Innovators
Liquid Death Just Finished Something Most Brands Won’t Even Attempt to Start.
Season one: The Deep from The Boys as an environmental spokesperson.
Season two: The Deep burns plastic next to children, the whole partnership falls apart on purpose.
Season three: Ashley Barrett gets promoted to VP, takes the slot.
Three years. Three acts. One consistent creative direction the whole way through. When they launched the Sparkling Energy line alongside it, the story was already there to support it. The audience had been following along.
The thing to remember: Most brands run campaigns. Liquid Death built something people actually followed. Not the same thing.
Target Did the Pokémon Drop Again. Sold Out Again. Still Not an Accident.
Target launched Pokémon x Target Drop 2 on June 6th. Over 40 products. Apparel, accessories, collectibles, summer stuff. All exclusive. All loaded with details that casual shoppers miss and collectors specifically hunt for.
Drop 1 went almost instantly in May. Drop 2 the samething. Target is the only mass retailer in the U.S. doing co-created, limited franchise drops at this scale, and they’re doing it on purpose.
The thing to remember: A big-box store using drop mechanics to feel like a boutique. The merch is the whole marketing strategy.
↗ Target Corporate / Game Rant / Siliconera
BRETT’S TAKE
The Brands Winning Right Now Are Telling Stories.
Adidas didn’t come up with “Backyard Legends” last month. They started building toward it at the 2024 Paris Olympics with the “You Got This” platform. By the time this film dropped, the audience already knew the language. The payoff felt earned because the setup had been running for two years.
Liquid Death didn’t create a brand story this week either. They wrapped one up. Three years, three acts, one consistent voice. The Sparkling Energy launch works because there was already a mythology in place to hold it.
Nike has 42 celebrities and a 12-week calendar and is losing the cultural moment to a company that just told one story and committed to it. FIFA has the biggest sporting event on the planet and is selling block-letter hoodies because branded merch got treated as a procurement decision instead of a brand decision, and nobody had the juice to push back on that.
A merch program built around an actual story gives people something to follow. They can feel like they’re in on something. That’s worth more than any single drop, no matter how good the product is. The drop is a chapter. The story is the brand. Two different investments with two very different returns.
Before the next quarterly brief, ask: What story is the brand in the middle of right now? Does anybody outside the building actually know it exists?
THE PITCH
Does your branded merchandise match the story you’re telling them?
Generic branded gear gets distributed every day at events. Most of it hits a drawer or a donation bin within a week. A merch program built around a real brand story produces a different result. You see it in what people actually do with the item after they get it.
We work with brand leaders who want the merch layer to match the story the brand is already telling. If your merch program feels like a line item and not a brand decision, let’s talk.
That’s it for this week…
Thanks for reading. Comment below and share far and wide.
P.S.
I’ve been in this industry since 2002 and I’ve seen a lot of product end up in a junk drawer or, worse, trash cans. I started this newsletter because I’m tired of pretending that’s OK.
Glad you’re here for Issue #1. See you next week.
